He's having an affair
Part of the deal with us picking up from the Bay Area to move family, home, and career to Seattle was that my C.G. got to get his dream car. I had no idea that a little car favored by lesbians and old retired folks (no offense to either group) in CA, would turn into a love affair for my C.G.10.0.2. Don't get me wrong. It's a cute car and I'm the one who found it on Craigslist. However, I thought that would be the end of it.
My C.G. has turned into one of those freaks that belong to a car club and goes on rides where you see a ton of cars on the road (a la Harley Davidson)all of the same make. He listens to podcasts about Minis. He dreams of silly red brakes? He babble about the John Cooper works package in his sleep. He even calls his Mini a "she," and has convinced my two smaller savages that she breathes through the front venting super-charger. He learned how to drive her better at professional driving lessons this August which cost us dearly. He's continually buying her trinkets, buttons, badges and treats. It makes me want to take a sledgehammer to the bitch.
(Note: Picture digitally obscured to hide the identity of the guilty whore)
Two days ago was the last straw! That bitch cost me $1700 in service and repairs. What's next, is he going to turn into one of those dorks who names their cars?!
1 Witty Comments For Me:
hilarious. almost woke the baby laughing so hard. bluring the pic was simply the most perfect touch.
sadly i understand...though my arch rival is a small black box most often playing some version of tiger woods golf. ugh save us
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