My Dentist is Cuter than Your Dentist

Santa you rock!

Santa gave me an early gift last night in the form of another windstorm. So SADLY my dental office who I stupidly arranged with months ago to have an appointment during the week before Christmas, SADLY lost power. Woohooo! I am not a fan of the dentist.

Although, as dentists go, mine is pretty rocking. Voted best in the Seattle area, it's a father & two son trio. Mine is the hot one. They also have sunglasses (no glare in my poor li'l eyes), televisions overhead with remote to change to WHATEVER station I want without a whine from the background, and a remote control for the massage dental chair. They also offer wax paraffin treatments and coffee/tea service.

The hygienists even dish juicy gossip in the area like--get this--Sammamish has one of the highest percentage of SWINGERS in the U.S. Egod! How do these women have time to have sex with someone other than their husband. My husband is lucky if he gets lucky once a month! Gosh! I guess this is another "keeping up with the Jones," here in Stepfordland a.k.a. "the Plateau."

A while back, my hottie dentist redid a crown that my old butcher (ahem) dentist in the Bay Area royally screwed up. Anyway, he did it with 1/2 the pain and 1/10 the time the other dentist took. Anyway, the office said this $900 treatment would be covered. I find out a few months later that it wasn't because the old crown was too new, albeit defective. I bitch to my new dentist. They say, I love this part, "you're right." Just gotta love those words. So my hottie dentist comp-ed me a $900 procedure. Gratis. FREE.

Anyhoo, I have been waiting patiently to get my crown (the non-biting outer side surface of a molar broke off weeks ago) fixed, but was too afraid to find the time. So I was waiting for this routine, now re-scheduled, appointment to spring it on him. It doesn't hurt, but now, just because I CAN'T go into until next week, yep, I am sure it will begin to hurt like a mother-fudger.

WHOA BETSY! Just thought of something! Hold the phone. My dentist is like a spa treatment (which I never do because that would be spending money on me--too cheap!) Why am I happy that I just lost a good TWO hours to read magazines without guilt, get a massage, get my smile brightened, look at my eye-candy dentist, and watch TV? SHIT! That is probably why I scheduled this appointment during the holiday week. This is the Mommy spa treatment for people like me who are too cheap to spend money on a spa treatment.

Santa-you suck rocks!

'lisciously scribed by Heather Murphy-Raines @ 8:00 AM