My Mother-In-Law Chose My Dishes

For the last 12 years or so, we have used dishes that my mother-in-law picked out. Pfaltzgraff Midnight Sun black dishes-- black with geometric designs.

They started as a starter set of place settings for four when my husband and I were living in sin in college. My husband liked them. I was just happy to have matching plates in college.

Then, the OCD in me required we match the set in our wedding registry. With extended family coming over, a place setting for four didn't cut it! But, truth be told, I always hated those black plates. Yet, I and my OCD, appreciated it every time my mother-in-law bought a creamer or gifted us another place setting.

Soon after our wedding, Pfaltzgraff discontinued the design , no doubt because of it's dated, eighties feel. No problem. My mother-in-law had an outlet and soon we had place settings for 13, plus serving dishes, creamers, tea pots, and butter dishes--all in resplendent black with geometric fucking shapes.

So time has passed--10 years or so--and we dwindled down to 6 plates and a variety of mugs and serving dishes that have survived the trenches of a kitchen full of a constantly cooking family of five always on the move with military and personal moves to Ft. Leonardwood,Missouri, then Fairbanks,Alaska then Pleasanton, California, followed by Antioch, California and now the Seattle area.

So honestly, CG's love for the dishes died years ago and he's been itching to replace them. Their ugliness and the fact that we had a matching set grew on me in those same years. So, the cheapskate in me was reluctant to buy new dishes, when we had perfectly good dishes that matched.

I also resisted the white, every day casual Pottery Barn and Crate and Barrel because they looked so pale and were so costly if we were to get a matching set of 12. I also had issues of size and rim. I liked the huge charger size plates with a very refined edge, which was hard to satisfy. Another of those OCD things about me.

So fast forward to yesterday. On a whim, we decided to go enjoy some meatballs and lingonberries at IKEA on the way back from our swim meet. There they were... beautiful, white, refined edge, and cheap. Well, after throwing down $300 on a whim for a set of 12 white chargers, dinner plates, rim soup bowls, and cereal bowls, maybe not so cheap. But, you can't go wrong with $4.99 a plate. I'm sure we would have paid a $1000 at Pottery Barn.

Suddenly, excited at the prospect of being free from a legacy of black plates I never chose, I insisted we stop at Safeway on the way back to make a brightly covered repast, honoring our new blank palate dishes. We ate in style:

Glistening spring greens tossed with a white Balsamic vinaigrette topped with bright ruby colored Bartlett pears and a nice delicately veined blue cheese

Zesty Coho salmon grilled with lemon, butter and fresh dill, mushroom risotto, barely grilled baby asparagus all garnished with truffle oil

A duo of CG's cheesecake and homemdade liquored truffles

Honestly, no dish was particularly special or out of the ordinary for us. But all looked sparkling new, brighter and better than before. There's something to be said about throwing out the old dishes and looking anew at one's menu.

I guess this has become a metaphor for one of my New Year's Resolutions. I am thinking I need to throw out my old dishes full of old grudges, resentments, anger, and most importantly, hurt feelings and looking at what's left. Looking at what remains through new eyes. Seeing the potential in glistening familial love, seeing the tenderness in forgiveness, seeing the zestiness in laughter, and the delicate veins of balance.

I've realized it doesn't have to be costly to take that first step or planned out; it can be fixed on a whim. It just requires courage. I need to renew my life's palate because I realized I don't want to hang on to those ugly plates. I want to treasure what's inside them.

'lisciously scribed by Scout's Honor @ 10:49 AM