Spring Break Wasted
No, not that kind of wasted. I do admit I have had more than my normal portions of alcohol to dull the pain of having all three kids home at the same time for a week with nothing to do. See! There! The "nothing to do" is the wasted part. Positively squandered. All I've been doing is looking at the purty flowers and staring at the lint between my milky white bosoms at our house. These ones were taken by CG:
Ewww! Did you think i would give you the cleavage shot??
Anyhoo, due to some thrifty planning, we will be going to Disney World soon, but not when the kids are off of school. We are the wicked and irresponsible ilk who are pulling the kids out of school to piggy-back on a business trip in Orlando where my husband has a convention. See that way his flight, the hotel room, and rental car are all paid by the company, and more importantly, not us. Then we just had to pay for tickets for four and a few extra days hotel to hang out on the beach.
We were going to go another level by buying the tickets with the tons of frequent flier miles CG has accrued because he traveled so @#$%^ much this year. However, I soon realized redeeming those tickets would turn a typical six hour flight into a circus of three layovers only if we stood on our head at the right time with Venus rising and a full moon and gave a blow job to the frequent flier redemption center assistant. Ummm... Alaska Airlines you suck! So, instead I went to Priceline and bid on tickets. Less than $200 (cheapest ticket at the time was $398!) each later from Seattle to Orlando, we are that much closer.
So, in honor of planning a huge and, yes, still expensive trip to Disney World, we didn't plan much this week. Ummm....we went bowling? Yup, that's about it. Oh, the kids caught up on every cartoon known to man and picked so many fights that the most frequent phrase this week used was, "Go to your room--Forever!" I was also mean Mommy and made them read and start to think about book reports that will be due when we get back from Florida. But wait, I hear D.World tickets are so expensive and in my fed-up mindset, I'm thinking that maybe we'll just trade a kid for a week Disney World Park Hopper and a fistful of fast-passes? Yep, then there'll be that much less homework for me to nag about when we get back.
So, gotta run. The neighborhood is starting to return from places like Maui, Whistler, Scottsdale and Sedona. We need to do something so the kidlets don't go back to school and share that all they did at Spring Break is bowl. Yep, got to keep up with those #$%^ Jones, so I get my Vacuous I Might be a Redhead in a Sea of Blond Trophy Wives, But Goddamn it My Kids Had Fun on Spring Break, Mommy of the Year Award:
We were going to go another level by buying the tickets with the tons of frequent flier miles CG has accrued because he traveled so @#$%^ much this year. However, I soon realized redeeming those tickets would turn a typical six hour flight into a circus of three layovers only if we stood on our head at the right time with Venus rising and a full moon and gave a blow job to the frequent flier redemption center assistant. Ummm... Alaska Airlines you suck! So, instead I went to Priceline and bid on tickets. Less than $200 (cheapest ticket at the time was $398!) each later from Seattle to Orlando, we are that much closer.
So, in honor of planning a huge and, yes, still expensive trip to Disney World, we didn't plan much this week. Ummm....we went bowling? Yup, that's about it. Oh, the kids caught up on every cartoon known to man and picked so many fights that the most frequent phrase this week used was, "Go to your room--Forever!" I was also mean Mommy and made them read and start to think about book reports that will be due when we get back from Florida. But wait, I hear D.World tickets are so expensive and in my fed-up mindset, I'm thinking that maybe we'll just trade a kid for a week Disney World Park Hopper and a fistful of fast-passes? Yep, then there'll be that much less homework for me to nag about when we get back.
So, gotta run. The neighborhood is starting to return from places like Maui, Whistler, Scottsdale and Sedona. We need to do something so the kidlets don't go back to school and share that all they did at Spring Break is bowl. Yep, got to keep up with those #$%^ Jones, so I get my Vacuous I Might be a Redhead in a Sea of Blond Trophy Wives, But Goddamn it My Kids Had Fun on Spring Break, Mommy of the Year Award:
Maybe some tennis, anyone?
3 Witty Comments For Me:
I'm all for the picture of your cleavage! Post it - you'll get all kinds of readers.
Umm. Any cleavage shots forthcoming?
Stop stalking me or I will chop you up into bits, dear husband o' mine. heh!
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