Hold the phones, people. Driving back from swim practice, I got to turn off the blasted DVD and listen to my love, NPR. I may be Republican, but I loves me some NPR.
SEE! I don't discount news sources just because they might have a lefty-agenda like liberals attack FOX news. You see, I came equipped with a brain and a little itty-bit of reason. Combine that with some edu-ma-cation, and I can listen with discerning logic. Did you get all that?!
Besides, their musical vignettes between stories just gives one such a sense of relaxation. And, I hate radio commercials. Nope, not in the market for a guitar at Guitar Center. Or a used car. Or a mattress from Sleep Country USA.
So back to NPR, on comes a report that:
" ONE IN SIX eight graders in Washington have drank alcohol."
Oh, NOES! Holy Shit, Batman! Oh, the beating of chests and wailing of all good mommies across the state! Well, all mommies but me because I'm on to their surveys of middle schoolers. I'm on to their scurvy survey shite. And, yeah, my kid is one of those six and he's only in sixth grade.
Precocious little bugger, isn't he?!