Circular Logic & Exposed: I'm on to Me!
Remember I needed to make that ablation/hysterectomy decision months ago?I've decided I am going to take baby steps.
Ablation it is.
Hysterectomy seemed so final and I worried about no more big "O's." Not that my period puts me in the mood that much anyway sadly for CG. Heh!
Just soo tired.
So decision made and yet, not scheduled?
Why? Someone stupidly became Li'l man's Halloween party mom, Swim Team Pool Representative, and PB's classroom coordinator.
CG did his best. Seriously by my side with my pen and sign up sheet in hand saying "No!" Friends suggested my previous convictions.
I didn't listen too well. Or maybe I did.
Seriously, it's an addiction.
Or perhaps...Or perhaps a way to procrastinate.
A road block of my own making.
To blame volunteering for never getting my house clean. Never studying for the LSAT so I can get going on my personal dreams. For never losing weight. For never concentrating on me.
Never looking in the mirror.
Great avoidance technique, eh? Does this sound familiar to anyone? Perhaps not fixing period by ablation or other surgical technique so one can blame tiredness.
Maybe. Very circular.
So, Halloween funds are mostly collected so room coordinating pain is mostly done. Halloween party is next week. Pool rep? Well it's on-going but volunteering is a requirement for swim team membership so why not this way?
So, no more excuses. Must start studying. Must start exercising and dieting for liver. Must make appointment for ablation. Must get off butt and clean house.
I'm on to me!
Seriously. I'm on to me!
No more excuses.So why am I still sitting at the laptop then you ask?
Tired.
Maybe when soul-sucking period is over too.
Did I mention today someone told me that anemia can cause fatty liver?
Circular as my butt.
Dropping my excuses and feeling naked.
Exposed.
Thx for Google images & flickr pics by prager.ws photoblog & by whizchickenonabun & by Christine ™
3 Witty Comments For Me:
I think you've made a good decision with choosing the ablation. No need to go to extremes just yet.
Maybe you can find an Ablation Volunteer Program. :P
Hope all goes well.
Amelia
x
sometimes I read your blog and see myself (it's all about me -right?) but this one really hit a home run- no pun intended.
From the doctor's appointment to the volunteering , well I'll get to the point procrastinating away one's life. A quote I recently read:"She's half-notes scattered without rhythm." by Ntozake Shange. The quote is in a book I received as a gift from a good friend called Meditations for women who do too much (I laughed when I first saw that title too) then it occured to me that it wasn't inteneded to be that kind of funny. ;)
Anyway the quote was followed by a short paragraph which I'll distill for you now.
"We know our lives have the potential of being a unique melody..." It is comforting to know that this confusion I use to cloud my thinking so I won't have to act."
There I said it.
as always- Mari
I was chronically anemic until I started doing my cooking in cast iron.
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