United States of Motherhood: June 2010

Friday, June 25, 2010

And Another Friday Night Funny

I used to have some feral kittens we recued that would suckle the shag rug. Then they decided to suckle each other. Two male cats. Always on the front porch when visitors came by, but this takes the cake!!

NSFW: Sorry Too Funny Coming From a Naughty Chick!!


What must go on in that household....Heh!

Left-Hand Discriminators: Shame on You Apple

Gadzooks!

It seems like the Iphone 4 is having some troubles.

Seems after people camped out in lines with hundreds of unwashed masses, the new piece of shite phone loses your signal if you hold the phone with your left hand.

Apple acknowledges their dirty secret problem. Their tech response is simply "Just avoid holding it that way."

Simple, eh?

Seriously. That "way" being left-handed. Note the use of the left hand in the marketing of the phone in image above. Not to to be too snarky (oh fucknuts you know me), but doesn't this fill your nostrils with the stench of FALSE ADVERTISING?!

Great, Apple. You Asshats! You essentially just eliminated all lefties from the market of your product. Doesn't that picture above just reek of smug, over-priced, sitting on your ass laurels and not even trying that hard?

As a mother of two lefties, I take offense. I might even press charges. You know...uhhhh.. discrimination against lefties. Disenfranchising like seven to ten percent of the population!

You just lost a customer. Well, maybe. Not that I would be buying an over-priced gadget that finally can run two apps at time. Nope not me!! Nope....hint great 4th of July gift to husband that had to buy his own Father's day gift on the actual day to replace something I broke! Heh?

Well... maybe not?

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Where In The World is Scout's Honor? One Word...

And that one word be...

Graduation.

CG's MBA from University of Washington!! Whoop!


After Graduation...

8th Grade!! Go Eldest for Making the Cumulative Honor Roll (Over 3.5 GPA).

After Graduation.

5th Grade!! She is one of a select few who made it into Humanities Plus Honor Program.

Three graduations in four days to be exact.

Add chaperoning 5th grade camp, a Canada travel meet, a bunch of parties to plan and organize, DVDs, and normal swim daily practice and you get the usual over-extended end of the school year that causes me to slit my wrists every year.

This year was just a bit worse, but hey, I'm back!!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Chris Brown Barred From Britain: Daayum! Like OMG!

Ahhh! Karma is so rich.

CNN just reported that:

"British officials, citing worries that singer Chris Brown might pose a danger to British citizens, barred him from entering the United Kingdom for concerts this week, a UK border official said.

Brown pleaded guilty last year to a felony charge of assaulting his then-girlfriend, pop star Rihanna."

OOPS! You thought you could smack her around and people who still buy your squeaky clean image. Thank God Britain has some sense and some taste.

Go whine some more on you Twitter like you already have:

"U ever feel like the storm clouds are too thick for any sunshine to get through?"

"think ima go away!!!!"

While you whine, we'll watch this mashup with your too hot for you ex Rhianna who is so better off without you.

Beating a woman never pays.



WTF: 3 Teens Suspended For Oral Sex on School Bus During Field Trip


Flickr photo by woodleywonderworks'


Three 14 year-olds were suspended by school authorities in Washington state this week following a sexual occurrence on a Kitsap School Bus.

A boy and one girl were suspended for engaging in oral sex while a second girl was suspended for recording the sexual acts on her cell phone. At least three other children were also witnesses to the sexual acts which occurred on the way to a field trip.

School authorities were notified by one of the girls' parents who had heard through other parents. Luckily, it seems the recording was not shared and was promptly deleted.

The case was assigned to the Kitsap County Sheriff's Office for possible criminal violations.

Patti Woolf, director of operations for the school district, said, "As far as we know, it's an isolated incident, and we always try to be as vigilant as possible."

Hmmm...

It seems she forgot about a recent incident also in Washington state...

Read More About It at The Stir

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Don't You Hate it When a Post is Just a Bunch of Links...

Well, me neither. Heh. That's my story and I am sticking to it!

So, my friends, busy times. 5th Grade Promotion, 8th Grade Graduation, and CG's MBA graduation all within three days next week.

Why is it end of the school year always makes me want to slit my wrists with all the last minute stuff and at the same time do grand jetes of joy that school's almost over and then we will live the life of leisure until I want to slit my wrists that my kids won't stop fighting, mimicking, telling on each other...and do another grand jete of joy when the school start count down begins at the end of summer...except wait!

Next year, my kidlets will be in three different schools spanning elementary, middle (Can't write this without telling you how proud I am that my baby girl made it into the Humanities Plus Honors English and Social Studies Program) and high schools. Sniffle. I want a do over.

Rinse, lather, repeat. Le sigh.

In the meantime?

I have been looking for bargains my friends. Getting frugal this summer. Looking for the most bang for my buck and even started updating my bargain blog for Seattle's Eastside like the Free Regal Movie Schedule for summer. Don't live on the Eastside? No worries, I am posting lots of national deals too. Such as free make-up from Sephora and free burgers from Red Robin on your birthday. Check it out!

Also, my friends?

Things are heating up at The Stir. Very heated. Yep, couldn't keep my mouth shut about people getting unemployment for TWO plus years on the backs of our children's future. Is this the legacy we want to leave our kids? Don't get me wrong. You pay into unemployment? You should get it's temporary use. Six months seems reasonable. Heck! I am not without compassion--one year even seems do-able since that is the average time to get a job in this economy according to my neighbor's job recruiter.

But TWO years and congress may extend again? Wrong! Yep, check out the comments. Whoo-ey, I bring out the haters.

Finally? I got interviewed about my sleeping habits.

Yikes, talk about too much information. Yep, I am a sleep stripper of the worst degree. As for the typos, hush now. Refer to the first part of this blog...seriously slitting wrists getting one kid ready for camp, another kid's lines in a Shakespearean play down, still not packed from last week's Canadian meet, and signed up to make two class video and burn 52 copies by next week. {Banging head} Stupid, stupid, stoopid.

So, yep, that sums it up. Help me, my friends? I am begging you. Tell me how you cope this time of year.

Thanks for Flicker cupcake photo by clevercupcakes

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