United States of Motherhood: August 2013

Friday, August 30, 2013

No Excuses

See this girl? 

She can barely  walk from a workout 17 hrs ago. Guess where she's going?

Yep crossfit ! Nothing better for sore muscles than a killer #wod to work out the lactic acid in those muscles and make different muscles sore! 

No excuses. No quitting my friends!

 How are you going to push yourself today?

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Schedule Your Clean Organic Produce Weekly With Full Circle Farms

Another fun delivery today!! 

Full Circle Farms delivered my massive harvest box chock full of organic fresh fruits and fruits.  

I Love my Thursday mornings when I open my door. 

This week's haul included:

  • Savoy Cabbage (1 ea.)
  • Zucchini (1.75 lbs.)
  • Cremini Mushrooms (0.66 lbs. not shown)
  • Gypsy Sweet Peppers (4 ea.)
  • Cucumbers (2 ea.)
  • Leeks (2 ea.)
  • Red Leaf Lettuce (1 bunch)
  • Green Kale (1 bunch)
  • Nectarines (4 ea.)
  • Cantaloupe (1 ea.)
  • Golden Delicious Apples (4 ea.)
  • Diamond Princess Peaches (4 ea.)

Yep all #clean , #organic and delivered weekly. This totally guarantees I will incorporate new fresh and healthy veggies and fruits in my families diet.

Want a promocode for 40% off the purchase of your first box with Full Circle? Follow link below and use the *promo code " USOM." 

So what are you waiting for?

Disclosure: I received no compensation for my review other than product. As always, all reviews are my honest opinion.

Confessions of a Laundry Room Screw Up

I am such a laundry screw up. See this timer? I need the clothes in this washer on my body in 11 minutes. 

 Yep 5 min (and probably more since my washer routinely LIES TO ME) until they escape from the washer only  to still go to the dryer. 

Something tells me I will be leaving the house in wet clothes.  

Good thing it's already raining right?

Le sigh...

Monday, August 26, 2013

NSFW: Will Smith, Miley Cyrus, Robing Thicke and the VMA's Make People Want to Sing Chicken Butt That's What!!

My friends?  I am dwelling on the positives of late: 

Source: GASP! Next time, we might want to leave the kiddos at home, Will? 

While I agree the train wreck of Miley Cyrus twerking on a man who could be her father, wildly lolling her tongue like my golden retriever, while he sings a "rapey" song based on it's pretty degrading video and grinding on foam fingers is desperately sad, I much prefer to draw attention to Will Smith and his wife Jada raising up their kids sheltered enough to be horrified with what they were seeing on-stage and recognizing it for the train wreck it was. 

How heartening! 

Although next time, we might want to leave the kiddos at home, Will? 

That said, now tell me friends how do I spin a positive for my teens who showed me the "Miley Cyrus has a chicken butt" pic that was plastered all over their FB and instagram walls from friends? 

SourceChicken butt that's what?? Nooooo Miley Cyrus,
national TV is not time for chicken pot pie and I don't care antics!!

As the theme of the night (and Robin Thicke's song goes) was she asking for this ridicule? And where the heck were her parents to yank her chicken butt off the stage!!

As for Robin Thicke? Don't get me started.  They played parts of his song at my daughter's USA Swim Western Zone competition two weeks ago and my jaw dropped!

Have no idea what I am talking about?  Need more info, make sure your kiddos are completely out of the room and then check these videos out.

Watch the full video MILEY CYRUS & Robin Thicke VMA video:

Get More: 

2013 VMA, Artists.MTV, Music, Miley Cyrus

Watch the full UNRATED Robin Thicke Blurred Lines video (Seriously NSFW):

Watch the full Miley Cyrus We Can't Stop:

Nope, I can't stop shaking my head...

Arrr Update: Just found out the Will Smith picture was NOT in reaction to Miley.  Dang there goes my positives for the VMA's. I'm fresh out of ideas...

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Fair Trade: Haircuts for Coffee

Coffee delivered as payment  for a haircut.  

Yep it's 8 am on a Saturday morning and my salon is open.  

Espresso always taken as a form of payment!! Other forms of payment include cooking me breakfast and, as always, neck massages are always welcome as tips!


Thursday, August 22, 2013

You Can Take a Kitty to Water But Heck if She Will Drink...

We FINALLY figured out a way to make our elderly kitty  drink more: 

Yes that's a vase with floral glass pebbles. 

I left it out one day after taking out some wilted flowers and she adopted it. 

We now keep a clean,flowerless water vase on our table and just imagine there are flowers there. Heh!

Perhaps it's the wider opening not crimping her whiskers? 

The clear view? 

The higher vantage point making her feel more secure? 

Who knows, but if you have a not-so-regular persnickety kitty who doesn't drink enough, this might be the solution for you. 


Pray for My Bladder, Pretty Please?

Sticking to my hydration goal: 

Fourth one of these today! 

Two quarts down and 2 two to go. Pray for my 41 year old--three babies later including one 10 pounder--bladder!!

 I got this...just minute...hold that thought...gotta run to the 'loo.

In the meantime?  

Drink, people, drink!! Water rocks!

Inquiring Minds Want to Know: Sock Challenged

On a scale of 1-10, how bad is it that this 41 year old mom hasn't worn matching socks in six months?!

Or that my kids' haven't matched in YEARS?!


Wednesday, August 21, 2013

On Middle School: Yes 41 year old Mothers Do Fling Their Panties in Middle School

Today was busy.  

Too busy for a summer day.  The whole week has been a long train of frazzled running late football practices, exhausting  crossfit, endless appointments to ready ourselves for school, and writing waaay too many checks to count. I am still trying to breath and catch up from the extended California swim meet and two months of swim competition and double swim practices.  August is usually my month to do so, but I find myself two-thirds through the month and not even started.

Yep...I am screwed and school and swimming has not even started yet. Neither has school supply shopping nor school clothes.

So today started with turning Li'l Man's woefully overgrown mullet into a trim mohawk-one in which he will spike.  Yep I refuse to do the 'do anymore especially since his school requires a 5:30 wake up come September. I don't brush my own hair at that hour so I sure as gizzards will not be combing his hair.

I was rather pleased with the result. Luckily so was he.

I then scribbled my way through forms printed on a printer that needed ink weeks ago and checked off checklists galore.

Minutes before leaving for school business days, we started a search for a shirt.  Any shirt for school pictures, but preferably one that hadn't been used in previous portraits...at least not with this kid's portraits. Score!

There once was a time where picture day required a meticulous week long shopping search for a complete ensemble.  Now reasonably clean and maybe a quick press will do.  Sigh...

We ran to the car and barreled off only to find a packed parking lot.  Double sigh...

We parked in a somewhat questionable zone and hurried to the school entrance when...


Yes, I felt a warm crawling down my thigh.

My eyes bulged.

I felt a brush along my calve.

I shriek.  I flailed my leg--sure a critter had gotten into my pants.




It seems I missed a clean pair when I was doing laundry and they had been folded into my pants only to slide out at the very most embarrassing point possible.

It seems my shrieking and flailing only served to make this ALL the more obvious.

Red-faced, I grabbed my panties now at the concrete entry to the school. Yes, people, middle school! You know--the source of endless embarrassment and awkwardness back in the day.

And now?  I've continued the tradition.  Now?  A source of endless embarrassment and awkwardness for my 6th grader who watched his mother stuff her panties into her purse.

Poor kid...

Yep, bad mother of the year moment! Silly moms who can't get their underwear in their capris. Gah!

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

My Three Month Fitness Goals: Hell Yes I am Saying THEM ALOUD and So Should You!!

I have some goals I want to share.  In years past, these goals would be about what the scale said or how many calories I stuffed in my mouth.  Now?

My goals currently are feeling fit, feeling good, fitting into smaller sizes and being strong. 

That simple.

How do I hope to achieve these goals? Telling you all what they are so you keep me accountable, pretty please?

My fantabulous goals:

  • I will finish 100 day burpee challenge (day #20 and going strong)
  • I will go back to STRICT paleo for a 30 day challenge re-set in September
  • I will continue moderate paleo after Sept, but allow myself treats
  • I will go to no fewer than seven crossfit wods a week
  • I want to deadlift 275# by Christmas (currently 235#) Help me, Santa!
  • I will move my butt 10,000 steps a day (Thank you Fitbit from #attseattle)
  • I want to clean 145# by Christmas (currently 130#)
  • I will get 8 hours rest per night (currently 5-6 at best)
  • I will drink more water and take my vitamins like a good girl
  • I will get to crossfit early to truly stretch and avoid injury
  • I will stay late at crossfit and always add some dessert like abmats
  • I will start doing yoga again at least twice a week!!

You will notice I couldn't care less about how many pounds I weigh.

Could. Not. Care.  Less.  

I may occasionally weigh myself, but as we all know muscle weighs more than fat.  The scale lies, but the mirror and jeans do not.

How do I know this? An awesome crossfitter called me the incredible shrinking Heather today. This was after I beat myself up standing on my scale this morning.

She saw what I could not when stuck looking down at the scale...progress! 

I knew this.  I know this.  Yet it is still easy to let bad habits sneak back into my life.  A lifetime of dieting and scale watching is hard to break.

We all need to look forward and up, my friends.  Never down. Never back.

Sooo my friends, what are your 3 month goals? Let me know.  I'd love to support you in your goals.  The first step is to say them aloud.  Tell your friends.  Tell your family.  Tell the world.

Saturday, August 17, 2013

My Own Neighborhood Wildlife Preserve, Wrong Turn & Kharma

This li'l guy just took a wrong turn into our house.  The boys thought they would squish him and burn him with fire. 

Imma a catch and release girl myself.  

This two incher now resides in a wildlife preserve I call the currently unoccupied repo house on our street.  

I'd like to think I have some pretty bitching' karma coming my way in the next life ESP if I come back as a spider. 

Live free and prosper Hairy the spider! 

Many apologies  to any future new neighbors who inherit the wildlife preserve!!


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